GIANTS VS. JETS (and other crap)...

First of all, did you guys know that apparently, neither the Jets nor the Giants have official cheerleaders? Look at what we are missing:

This is bullshit!

Now down to business. The Giants are playing the Jets this Saturday in their annual preseason game. I have been to several of these games and I can tell you that nobody who has half a brain gives a shit who wins. Like most preseason games, I pray for no injuries to any Jets, and hope that the players get into fighting shape. Certainly, preseason is simply a stage for the non-roster invitees and other hopefuls to make a name for themselves. That usually involves them doing something stupid and injuring themselves or others. While we could have gone to the game this year, I have a wedding to go to and that means my free tickets were given to others more worthy than Unruly, Mooks, etc. No offense to them, it's just that my boss isn't friends with them.

Speaking of the wedding, I'm not going to know a sole (save for the bride and groom) but those are the best types of weddings to go to. I can be Drunky McDrunkerson and nobody is going to remember me (except when I take over the dance floor and become a star for 20 minutes).

Anyway, as for the regular season match-up, our quest for tickets continues. I agree with Unruly's prior comments, we will get into the parking lot and score tickets for fair market value midway through the first quarter. It is pretty much our plan, except that if our buddy from that awesome website "2bhip" belt buckles, hooks us up with free tickets.

As for the Jets, Jones needs to get healthy, Chad needs to step it up, and the D needs to stop the run this year. As for Revis, I hope he's the real deal. Something tells me that he may be.


I'm glad Vick (aka Cunthead) is pleading guilty. It shows a couple of things: 1. He must have done something wrong. 2. You can't fuck with the feds because they are a bunch of cheating fucks who will stop at nothing until they destroy you unless you acquiesce. And 3. His lawyers, if they are worth a pound of salt, spoke to the NFL prior to entering the plea agreement and were given some sort of assurances that Vick's career is not over if he serves his time and makes some atonements. To be honest, I would have thought that the only way Vick plays another down in this country is if he went to trial and won. I'm sure he is guilty though, so he decided to take a chance and I guess hope that the NFL will let him back in one day. I doubt the World Football League or CFL will pay him as much. Shit, I don't even think Unruly's League would allow him to play in it.

Check out the Mets blog, there is a new post on it.

I rented the show "Dexter" and while I have only watched one episode, it is pretty fucking cool. The "hero" is a serial killer who kills other murderers. Interesting. It reminds me of what Figs would be like if he had not managed to suppress his urge to kill. (Thanks to MJ!) ha ha

Music is a wonderful thing. I wish I could play the guitar. Plus, it gets you tons of ass. Speaking of which, Bruce Springsteen is coming out with a new CD this October (Magic). I plan on purchasing same, along with tickets to his ensuing tour. I hope Mooks and Figs and Unruly join me at the concert (or at least Mooks and Unrules, who still live in NJ).

Question of the day:

F, Marry or Kill:

Heidi Klum

Tyra Banks

Sharon Stone

My answer: Kill both Tyra and Sharon (make it look like a murder suicide) and Marry Heidi Klum, because then, hopefully, you get to bang her too. That's why this game is stupid.

Oh yeah, Go Jets!


Unruly said...

You are a funny guy Fakehead. I wouldn't marry any of them because I have decided that Marriage is unconstitutional.

As for the Jets...I hope Chad has more zip on the ball this year. I have been very impressed with Clemens this preseason albiet he is playing against the second team every time.

He looks 100% better than Brad Smith does behind center...although I know BS is just going to be brought in for trick plays if he is not at WR.

At any rate, Chad's arm has not looked better this year than last year. I hate how his balls just float up there. Although, somehow they do get completed sometimes.

Fakehead said...

Chad's balls remind me of big, hairy apes. Oh, I mean, Chad's football throws are in the air longer than the fucking Hindenburg was. That being said, the guy is a leader and I want him at the helm this year, at least until he proves he can't do it anymore.

Look at Eli, he is the opposite of a leader. I feel bad for him (as much as it is possible to feel bad for a guy who never has to worry about money for the rest of his life, so, in retrospect, fuck that cunt). Even Tiki is throwing Eli under the bus, but Tiki's credibility is suspect. I used to respect him, but now that he is just another media whore, I say fuck him. Next thing you know he'll be in a fucking suit with neon flashing lights like Michael IRving or Deion Sanders, jumping around on a fucking 10 yard piece of astroturf when Terry Bradshaw is trying to tackle him and Troy Aikman is faking throwing a pass to him. I think Tiki has more brains than most NFL players, having gone to UVA, but I could be wrong. After all, my brother went to UVA, and he thinks he is smarter than he is. (No offense to him). Maybe it's a UVA thing.

At any rate, GO JETS!

Fakehead said...


Figs said...

First of all, my plans to kill were all in my youth. I'll just say you assholes are lucky to have made it out of 7th grade, when you decided to dump me and rag on me while my parents were getting a divorce. Thanks a fucking lot, I sure deserved that. But you will serve your time in hell for that, so I'm over seeking earthly revenge.

Secondly, Tiki's performance on Sunday Night Football was nothing short of deplorable. I fucking HATE that guy now and it will take a minimum of 20 years to even think about him positively again. He basically has created all this controversy for taking shots at his old team. Plus, now he keeps company with fucking dickless losers like Bob Costas and Chris Collinsworth. Meanwhile, Eli was handling the first team Raven defense. They did no analysis of the first half! They ragged on Eli to make themselves feel good and important. I fired off emails to NBC that night.

Keep talking bad about Eli, we'll see how the year plays out and then you fuckers will all be in the same boat with Collinsworth. It is unfair the amount of scrutiny on this kid. 48 TD's in two seasons is nothing to sneeze at. And people talk about him sucking? Ben Roethlisberger has never thrown for 20 TD's in a year in his career. Infact, this is Big Ben's FIRST year calling out protevtion at the line. 4 years in! So who's the better QB?

I will come to NJ and fucking fight people dissing ELI. As for you schmoes, I'll just wait until WE get on the field and the big guy in the Eli jersey will be pounding you into the ground.

f.i.g. said...

Oh yeah, what's with all the Springsteen acoustic stuff lately? I guess the E street band is done in.

fakey said...

The new album is with the E Street Band.

And I'm going to hell for a lot of reasons, the least of which have to do with you. For what it's worth, I apologize.

Unruly said...

Figs, not for nothing you are smoking more than gravity if you think Eli will ever be better than sucky.

Dude, seriously if he is playing next year I guarentee it will be for the Ottawa Argonots.

In other news, NJ is so over rated.

Figs said...

Unruler, don't spoil your otherwise solid reputation as a guy in the know about pigskin by making peer pressure predictions. It is unbecoming.

Now I have your guarantee that Eli will have a sucky year. You sure you don't want a retraction, I'll give you one chance.

fakefuck said...

Eli blows more than a 2 dollar crackwhore. He's not Peyton, get used it.

No Rules, Just Jets said...

Eli needs to have an emotion other than retard. He never gets fired up. He should be telling night time stories because he puts me to sleep. If he could smile or get angry or anything I would like that. Other than that, I think he had a good game Sat. Smell you later.