Beware of the Broncos

Wow. What an offseason for the Denver Broncos thus far. Starting cornerback Darrent Williams is senselessly murdered in the wee hours of New Years day, hours after losing to the 49'ers and Denver missing the 2007 NFL playoffs for the first time in 4 years. Backup running back Damien Nash collapses and dies after 10 minutes of light basketball at his St. Louis charity event for his older brother, who himself had a heart transplant a year ago.

Two funerals the team has collectively been two in less than three months time. Nearly 4 percent of last year's team has DIED, both at 24.

Dre Bly is acquired to take the cornerback spot opposite the incredible Champ Bailey, replacing the slain Williams. Bly is a Pro-Bowler himself, and Lord knows how much action he is going to see this year. They're going to HAVE to throw at Champ, and that is going to be awesome.


Running Back Travis Henry is acquired from the Tennessee Titans. Henry, a small and physical back, will have a 1400 yard year barring any injuries or suspensions. Running backs barely get touched in the Denver running game, Henry will chew it up. With emerging youngster Mike Bell as the relief back, Denver will be a top rushing team again. Which only opens up the pass, which brings me to:


That's right, Daniel Graham and Brandon Stokely have been brought in also.
Then we get to the subject of the EXISTING players:

Javon Walker is the shit, he made some unbelievable plays last year. The change at quarterback disrupted him for a few games, so did Plummer's lack of production early in the year. He's a Pro-Bowl claiber reciever though. And supplementing him in the No. 2 slot is a phenom that you probably haven't heard of:
Brandon Marshall. 6' 4", 225 lbs, 4.4 speed. He showed tremendous ability in some limited opportunities last year. I go to Broncos camp at least 3 times a summer and I saw him put on some shows, the above picture is one of the many. Big time up-and-coming guy. Then there is ol' reliable:
Future Hall-of-Famer Rod Smith. An impeccable possession receiver. Rod, go find the hole in the zone and here comes the ball on 3rd down, nice catch, thank you very much.

There is also a crazy-sick pass-catching tight end named Tony Scheffler who will be a big fantasy sleeper, so pay attention fellas:
And all will be delivered by a huge fantasy sleeper next season, a cannon-armed cat named Jay Cutler.
They say that this LaMarcus Russell kid from LSU that is supposed to go in the first pick of the draft can throw the ball 80 yards, 50 on his knees. I shit you not, Cutler is fuckin' close to that, and I have NEVER seen a football travel so fast! Not Marino, not Elway, maybe Brett Favre.

Watch out for the Broncos and the Patriots, AFC. They attacked this offseason like no two other teams. The draft is going to be real interesting, I can't wait already. It always happens on or near my birthday (April 30) , so the Giants pick is always my present. Some years more so than others.


Unruly Jets Fan said...

Thanks Figgy for the whole outline of the Bronco's team. It was actually very well written and actually informative. I didn't know that Stokely and Bly went to the Broncos.

Good thing the Jets do not have to face the Bronco's in regular season but it looks like they might be facing them in the post season. That is if the Bronco's get there that is.

Fakecracker said...

Rod Smith is still alive?
You don't have to quess what that sarcastic question means, the man is OLD. Only certain receivers are good when they get old, (Jerry Rice), and even then those old guys get older and they are washed up. (I forget the guy's name who played on the Raiders - oh year, Tim Brown? I don't even remember the other okay old receiver that wouldn't quit and they stopped the Jets game in the middle of it to give the dickhead the game ball for having 1000 receptions or something ridiculous like that. What the fuck was that guy's name? If he's not on "Dancing with the Stars" then I don't know who he is).

Regardless, I agree that the Broncos will be okay this year, but they aren't going anywhere in the playoffs, if they even get there. I though Bly wasn't happy about going there? Cutler still needs to get settled back there, just because he can throw the ball 80 yards doesn't mean it will be near a receiver or caught by a guy on his team. The jury is still out on Cutler, he is a young guy.

Graham, Stokely and Walker are only as good as their QBs make them. I don't trust any Pat recievers, just look at Deion Branch, the motherfucker ruined my fantasy football team last year because I thought he was good. He wasn't that great and Hassleback blew. So, it is all up to Cutler, can he survive under the pressure? We'll see.

And for such a Giants fan you certainly love those Broncos. I'm sure you won't write any Giants blogs here because:
1. They are awful and they are going to suck next year.
2. You will get lambasted by the bastion of Jets fans that frequent this website.

Okay, so only number 1 is true, but what have the Giants done this offseason? Droughens isn't that good, they don't even have a kicker, and they still have the loud mouths Shockey and Plaxico and the same mild-mannered, awful QB. Not to mention the fact their offense is old and terrible.

Anyway, go Jets!

faketaco said...

I meant their defense is terrible. There are a ton of typos in that comment but I can't fix it.
"oh yeah" instead of "oh year"
and thought instead of though
and that whole paragraph about Tim Brown is fucked.

Anyway, I'm tired.

Mookie McFly said...

The Denver Broncos beat the Nets last night, right?

The Overfloater said...

Hardy har, Mooks. Yes, the Nuggets are learning how to play together. It's getting good, except that we have no post threat except carmelo. WE need a offensive post scoring big man. Then you can play a half-court offensive game.

Dude, Fakehead, you must come to grips with the Giants. IT'S THE NFC! Matbe some of those things you said were true, but it doesn't matter, IT'S THE NFC! A truly flawed team can make it all the way. Say what you want, but Eli is only going to get better. Plax and Shockey's attitude really started to come around at the end of the season and they fought hard in their playoff game. The coaching situation was a serious issue. But look at David Carr, Mike Vick is having his troubles, Roethlisberger threw 23 INT's last year - the arguement that skill players are only as good as their QB makes them is true, but with a lackluster coaching staff and O line ANY offense is going to be inconsistent, any QB isn't going to look great. Think about the O-line Chad has had the good fortune to play for, O line is a major focus for a coach like Herm Edwards and now Mangini. Be critical, but be fair too.

Tiki's abscence will have the vacuum of a black hole, we need to turn into a methodical, 4-yards per run type of team. I don't really think you know Rueben Droughns, admitedly he's not a top-tier RB like Tiki was, but he is definitely a move-the-chains dude, he just hits upfield. I have had the benefit of seeing him play 3 or 4 years in Denver where he started off as Fullback and did a good job. Then he stepped in at RB and had a great season. Coupling him with Jacobs will work, but who's going to bail us out with those timely screen plays? Answer: get a scat-back, One of Dave Meggett's 19 illegitimate children must be old enough by now.

Defense is old because Strahan is old. They got rid of the LB's besides Pro-Bowler Antonio Pierce. Secondary is a HUGE concern right now though. And what the hell is going on with Kicker? I liked Jay Feely. Maybe his brother Touchy is looking for work...

As for Cutler and the broncos...what can I say, when in Rome...

I am going so far as to say this, draft Cutler after your RB's and a good receiver. He'll be there in the 3rd or 4th round I bet. He is a NATURAL and plays hard. He can fit some crazy balls in nutso places, I watched him from training camp till the end of the season. In 5 starts last year, he threw 9 TD's. John Elway threw 8 TD's his rookie year and he played in 13 games or so.

Caymus67 said...

What have the Bronocs done since John Elway retired? Enough said.

Mookie McFly said...

Good point Caymus.

Hey bitches, time to start working next door at Mets3X...

Plus working on a fantasy league that will require no checking, trades or anything else. Perhaps a Mets fantasy league where we each selct one position player, bench guy, pitcher (no releivers) and a point system. You would only need to change guys if someone got hurt and you would not be penalized. I'll work out the kinks.

Unruly Jets Fan said...

I am down for Fantasy Baseball and helping you pimp out your site Mooks.

I have come a long way in the month since I have taken over the IT functions of this site. I can help you help yourself if you know what I mean.

fake said...

I am down for fantasy baseball too.