"Don't tease me about my hobbies. I don't tease you about being an asshole."

That is what I say to Giants fans this year when they make fun of my appreciation for the New York Jets.

Are the Jets going to win on Sunday? If they do, I will be a happy man. If Chad shows up and the Blaylock can get some yards on the ground (along with Barlow and Huston, I guess) then I think Gang Green has a good shot at beating Kerry Collins (are you kidding me?) and the Titans. As far as the D goes, the Titans have an OK running back and you know that Kerry is going to throw 2 or 3 picks (along with a few TDs). That means the Jets have a shot on Sunday. I'll be watching (and flipping back and forth between the Mets game).

Regardless, any happiness I garner from a Jets win will be compounded if the Giants lose in the battle of the "Never Going to Win a Big Game" Mannings. I don't want the Giants to lose because I want to see my man's former team win, but because I hate the Giants and most of their fans. There are a few Giants fans I actually like, but only because I choose to overlook that aspect of their personalities.

For some reason, Giants fans always think they are better than Jets fans. I'm not sure why this is so. Perhaps because they tailgate with wine and mixed drinks and leather chairs and Webber grills with swordfish on them and Jets fans eat "Extra Cheesier" Doritos out of the bag and drink Bud. And maybe Jets fans like to fight every once and a while and say the words like: "Fuckhead" "Asshole" "Stupid Motherfucker" and "Dirty Cuntbag" when describing the opposing team's players, the officials, the coaches of either team or even the some Jets players.

Maybe, just maybe, Giants fans think they are a little more polished and that their team is better than our Jets. The only thing I can say to all Giants fans who share this ill-advised thought process is: Go fuck yourselves, you dirty cuntbags.


Eric Man-gina said...

I am so getting rid of my Webber grill with the swordfish cooking on it...

dolphin hater said...

There is one thing I hate more than Dolphin fans and that is Giants fans. Nice blog Dick Fan! Or do you prefer Fan of Dick?

I would prefer Dick Fan, not that there is anything wrong with Fan of Dick.

At any rate, I have one thing to say to Giants fans, "Get out of our Stadium!" That is after I say, "Would you please pass the Grey Poupon?", of course.