Where Is Some DDT When You F@#%$^ Need It?

Allright! I'm back to being a Jets fan, ESPECIALLY this weekend when the J-E-T-S take on my most loathed team in the NFL, the Philly Eagles.

The Iggles are coming off a Bye week and are looking for their second win of the season. But, as we all know, the Eagles reside in the NFC - where you can make the playoffs these days at 8-8. The Jets live in that all-competitive AFC, where 5 losses means you are fighting for a wild-card berth. 5 losses in the NFC gets you home field advantage throughout the playoffs.

My point, gentlemen and lady, is that the Jets are going to have to want this one more. I thought they played one great half of football in last week's first half. But look at what the Giants had did to the Eagles the week before, 12 sacks. 1 sack on Pennington.

The Jets defense needs to make McNabb uncomfortable early and has to limit Westbrook's damage. I think the Jets linebackers are up for the challenge, Barton, Vilma and Harris. The Philly D is not as stout in the middle as it once was. You can run the ball on them. Jevon Kearse is just another DE against the run but excels in pass rush.

Screens are absolutely key against the aggressive blitzing defense of Eagles Def Coordinator Jim Johnson. Why do you think Tiki Barber had all those big games against the Eagles? He either had a 50-yard TD rushing or on a screen pass every game. L Wash, as he is now known, could fill a similar roll. Thomas Jones can wear them down all game. Limit Chad to no more than 25 passes.

Mangini, I know you are out there scouring blog world for these coaching tips by armchair geniuses. Well, listen to this one! As a Giants fan, I know the Eagles all too well. We also know how to beat them. Put the game on McNabb and keep him in the pocket, his throwing accuracy goes down the stiller he becomes. Don't leave your gaps with McNabb because he is as shifty as they come, a strong dude who can hurl it 60 yards no problem while falling backwards.

My prediction: Jets 17 Eagles 13



You are only rooting for the Jets because they are playing the Eagles, but we'll take it.

Jets need this one BAD.

Jets 23
Eagles 21

And I hope Westbrook scores 3 tds in a losing effort. (See what fantasy football has done to me, I'm a jerkoff, fucking fantasy football).


I may be pumpkin picking during this game. Yeah, you read it right, pumpkin picking. Somebody kill me now. I remember when my family needed a pumpkin we went to the fucking supermarket and picked one out of a fucking huge cardboard box and it cost 5 bucks. Now I have to go to Unruly Country (i.e., west Morris County) and fucking walk in the "pumpkin patch, i.e., pumpkins scattered on the ground with haystacks) and pay 20 bucks for the same pumpkin I could have bought from "Jose" at Shoprite. I only wish that I had thought of the pumpkin patch racket before those fuckheads with the farms did. Or maybe Charlie Brown's author made up a pumpkin patch. Not sure.

Anyway, Happy Fucking Halloween!!!



Figgis Mulcahy said...

I remember whenever you wanted a pumpkin you would just wait till dark and go out and trash Mike Shera's up the street or something. Man, has old age and marriage beat you down. You used to be a stallion, now: my little pony.

I only root for the Jets when they aren't playing the Giants. So that's nearly every week. No way the Jets O scores 27 pts on that Iggle defense though. Sorry. I think it will be a game in the 'teens.

I saw Bruce 3 or four years ago at Mile High Stadium. He played 4 hours and change. They turned the lights on him after the third hour but he just kept on playing. It really was one of the best concerts I ever saw and I was singing almost the whole time. Crowd was great, Bruce was running around like a guy in his 20's instead of 60's.

Fakehead Almighty said...

He's only 58, but yes, he fucking rocks. I never stole Mike's pumpkins. At least I didn't scare the shit out of him and then apologize later. (Ask Unruly about that one).

Goooooooooo Jets!

Shera said...

At least you didn't ding-dong-ditch and egg his house once a month, ...while Unruly videotaped from inside a bush across the street with a little piece of duct tape over the camera's red light.

Oh, wait a second....

Anonymous said...

How was your pumkin Fakehead??? I heard if you drill a hole in one and screw it it feels just like a guy's ass...

Fakehead said...

You would know Mofo!