I think I'm in the final stage of grief for the fucking Jets... (and other stuff)

First of all, I want to say, on behalf of all Jets' fans, thanks to Chad Pennington. He will always be one of my favorite Jets because he has heart, grit and great leadership skills. His career with the Jets is likely over, and it's unfortunately time. Let's hope he mentors Clemens and Clemens learns a thing or two the last half of the season, because Chad will likely be gone after this year.

Now, as to the title of this particular post, I think I have finally overcome the five stages of grief as far as the Jets go. I was definitely in denial when the Jets played the Giants. I thought FOR SURE the Jets were going to win, up until the 4th quarter. I thought, "This can't be happening" as the Jets shit the bed and lost.

Then, when the Jets played the Eagles, I was in denial but it quickly turned to anger as they again shit the bed and lost a game they should have won. I complained that it was "not fair" and "why me", especially after the other team I loved, the New York Metropolitans, ripped my heart out and stomped on it after being in first place for 160 games of the season.

Then, with the Bengals, I started the bargaining process, "Just let the Jets win and I won't kill myself today." Ha ha, not that drastic, but I was just thinking if the Jets could beat the awful Bengals then the rest of the season could be at least okay with a few wins and Chad could show the rest of the world that he was still a starting quarterback in the NFL.

Finally, I went through the last two steps of grief, (depression and acceptance) yesterday. After Evans caught that ball that ended the game (although it was over once the Jets punted on their last real drive) I was depressed. I got more depressed when Clemens came out, although I was relieved in a way that it was finally over for Chad. Regardless, he looked depressed just standing there, like "Fucking A. I can't believe it's finally over." I saw him talking to my other favorite Jet, J. Vilma, who apparently wants out and the two were probably commiserating with one another. Then Chad was alone, just watching the game like any other back up player, and it was depressing. Finally, the game was over, and Clemens threw two interceptions and about three good passes, I finally accepted that yes, the Jets blow this year. Their season is over I hope they get some good defensive players in next year's draft. They may or may not win 2 games the rest of the season, maybe 3 if they are lucky. Vilma is going to be gone by the end of the year and I don't even understand what happened to him. Chad is done and will likely never start a meaningful game again (although I hope he does somewhere). Clemens is the future and he needs the rest of the season to have Chad mentor him and to get some experience.

Now that I have accepted that the Jets blow I feel better. There are still traces of depression but there's nothing anyone (including, apparently, the Jets' coaches) to stop the Jets from sucking this year. I hope Clemens can make it interesting. I am not looking forward to when the Jets play the Pats in December. I see the final score being 80-17, and I'm not kidding. No matter what, I'm still going to root for them, and it will be interesting to see how Clemens develops the rest of the season. Oh, and if Mangina doesn't start Clemens now, he needs to be fired, immediately. But you know what, it's going to be okay!

With all of that said, Go Jets!

OTHER RANTS....

1. Let's talk about the mother fucking Patriots. I fucking HATE them so much it makes my stomach cancer flare up. These cunts keep running up the score on teams like fucking Bobby Bowden used to do (when he had good teams) in college. 52-7? Bellicunt goes for it on 4th down when he is up 38-0 and 45-0? They keep passing the ball? And that fucking cunt Brady (who was wearing the gayest hat in the world at the post-game press conference and yes, I know his girlfriend probably bought it for him and I am jealous but still) can't even give the ball to his fucking running back but he has to hog all the glory and score two TDS himself? Not only is a jerkoff, but he is fucking killing my fantasy football team (I have Maloney or however you spell it and I lost to fucking Unruly - losing in FF almost hurts my heart as much as a Jets loss)!!!!!!! What the fuck!!!!!!!!! There is no reason to like the Pats. Their coach is a cheating tool, the quarterback is an absentee father, and they are too fucking good for their own good. I hope the following things happen:

1. The Simpson erase the episode Brady guest starred on forever and never release it on DVD.
2. Brady breaks his fucking leg in 20 places. (What ever happened to putting bounties on players? Why can't Mangina show some balls and put a bounty out on Brady, that would be the most awesome thing in the world!)
3. Bellicunt's sons or whatever offspring he has get another DWI and embarrasses him again.
4. Bellicunt gets hit in the head by an errant Peyton Manning pass (hopefully intentional) and he needs brain surgery and misses the rest of the season.

While I want all of that to happen, what is probably going to happen is that the Pats will go undefeated and win the fucking Super Bowl. The Colts have no chance next weekend, unless they score 65 points. Oh, the Simpons creators will never pass up on opportunity to make money, so forget about getting rid of episode of a DVD release. Shit, Brady will even commentate on that one.

2. England saw the worst football game of the year yesterday. Yeah, that is going to make them love American football, a 13-3 mudbowl with the shittiest team in the NFL and the most boring. Give me a break. Send the Bengals over there, with the gay crackhead, he would have riled up the crowd. There was no TD celebrations, (of course because boring Eli scored), no fun plays, nothing. It was as boring as a regular season baseball game between the Kansas City Royals and the fucking Pittsburgh Pirates. Who the fuck cares? Oh, and do the players have to keep complaining about the field and the long plane ride and the small hotel rooms. It's fucking Eurpoe! Get over it! No, it's not the same as the fucking Los Angeles Radisson, the room is smaller, and guess what the fucking food is a little bit different too. Jesus, you would think the game was being played in fucking Japan or some shit. It's England, you can at least understand everyone, right? Yeah, it's just like America, except most people have fucked up teeth! (Seriously though, they don't. There are a lot of hot chics in England). (If they were in Japan they would say, "Everyone is talking in this fucked up language and I can't understand what they are saying? Don't they speak American? NO! You shithead, you are in fucking Japan!) Regardless, if I were a Giants player I would have gone to the pubs and gotten hammered, especially after the game. There would have been an international incident. I also would have never cried about the time difference and how my schedule was fucked up. Waaa! Waaaaa! Why is Strahan in such a hurry to get back to America, all that he has to welcome him is an empty house, a cunt ex-wife, bills from lawyers, solicitations from dentists all over the world, and probably some cokehead strippers (okay, that's pretty cool).

3. The Red Sox won the World Series. Hey Figs, how was the walk back to your house from Rocky Stadium after that happened? I'm sure it was great (for a Boston fan). The Sox are the team to beat this century so far. With Gay-Rod opting out he'll probably play for them next year. I hope that cunt never wins a World Series.

4. Rutgers shits the bed again. I have no respect for them after the Navy booing, so fuck them and all those stupid fucks who paint themselves red to watch the games. The sight of the dejected look in their eyes after the third quarter (as they sat in the pouring rain, still their red paint glistening but never washing off) I laughed at their patheticness. This could have been their year too, oh well.

5. Do you think Tina Fey is hot?

I have been watching "30 Rock" and it definitely one of the best shows on TV. I can't figure out whether or not Tina Fey is hot. Let's face it, she has some crazy scar on her face and I don't know how it happened. She refuses to talk about it but said it happened during her childhood. Also, her ears are rather large and seem to be slanted or something. But, he is cute, she has her moments when she looks okay and she is smart and funny. So what do you think? I ask you, two readers of this blog, whether or not Fey is hot... I will say, "a little." However, she is a different kind of hot than Alexandria Ambroisia or however the fuck you say her name, because double-A is smoking hot, no matter what ridiculous get-up Victoria Secret makes her dress up in.